Dining in Splitsville
Question: I met up with a girl I used to date for dinner, to catch up for the first time since we broke up (amicably) a few months ago. When the check came, she seemed to intentionally ignore it, and so I just handled it. Is that right though, considering that we’re not together any more? I used to pay for most things when we were together, but I guess I only assumed that would come to an end when we did too.
Answer: That was an odd assumption on her part; she definitely should have offered to chip in. The only possible exceptions would be: A) you were the one pressing for the little reunion while she was indifferent, and so she didn’t feel the need to put herself out for it or B) your job pays so much better than hers that it would have been silly to ask her to pay.
But this is the first time you’ve gotten together since your breakup, and perhaps instead of splitting it (which is always a bit impersonal) this time, it’s her plan to pick up the tab the next time around.
If there is a next time (which is your call) and she still doesn’t offer to cough up some dough, simply stop going out to dinner together. Which is kind of the point of a breakup, isn’t it?