Question: A couple that I am close to broke up. I was friends with both of them equally, and now I don’t know what to do. The break was initiated by one, but both decided it was for the best. Now they don’t want to be in the same room together. How do I preserve my social circle?
Answer: You can’t preserve the crew. At least, not initially. If you try to stay neutral, chances are that you’ll just wind up a crappy friend to both of them. It would be great to live in a world in which everyone put their egos aside and just got along, but it takes some time for the dust to settle in this type of situation: they’re hurt, at least one of them feels wronged, and you can’t fix that.
So until a year or so has passed, or both are happily paired with other people, stick with the friend you knew first. If you got to know them at the same time, then pick the one you like best. If you can’t decide which you like best, pick the one who you feel enriches your life the most. If you still can’t decide, then bust out some romcom-esque hijinks and make them get back together so that you don’t have to deal with this dilemma.